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- ^^
- Exercise
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- Submitted by Dennis Robb
-
- It is well documented that for every minute that you exercise, you
- add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to
- spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.
-
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- My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now
- she's 97 years old and we don't know where the hell she is.
-
- The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear
- heavy breathing again.
-
- I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't
- lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
-
- I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out
- what I'm doing.
-
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy
- me.
-
- I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
-
- The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
-
- If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small
- country.
-
- And last but not least:
-
- I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.
-
- You could run this over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to
- them! :)
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